It can be given but not taken away

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Anything you say can be used against you.

It also might not.

Anything that is found out about you, that you didn’t say, can be used against you, too.

It also might not.


Information is like a flame—it is multiplied when it is given, not subtracted. If I give you information, I don’t then lose it. Instead, we both have it.

Sometimes, however, when the information is deeply personal, sharing it can feel like removing a part of the self and transferring it to another. It becomes important to know who has it, what they will do with it, and whether they will regard it as you do. At that point, you are holding on to their “copy” of the knowledge as though it’s still part of your world.

But it no longer is.


That’s why it’s easier to think of any detail you share as like a whiff of perfume that someone catches. You don’t lose the perfume you’re wearing when someone takes a sniff. The scent has gone to them, but not away from you.

It doesn’t matter if they form their own impressions that are very different from yours. It doesn’t matter if they forget. Because you have zero control over any of it.

(Indulging another’s idle curiosity can get tiresome, so either do it or don’t… but if you do, don’t worry yourself over what might happen next.)


Like perfume, knowledge can be shared in(de)finitely.






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